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151: Inconsistent Villains 152: Shadow Of The Gad (rin)  Post: 03.31.2007Date: 10.26.2196 Time: Night Inconsistent Villains (GO) goes the world. I come awake, still sitting on the floor, afterimages of DevilGOD and my daughter sleeping in his hands fading like a setting sun. Still holding hands with a Driftling and a wirewitch. shea(3)va and JACK. I keep my eyes closed, my mind open, but there's nothing there. The connection's gone. I start to push harder, desperate to reestablish the link. There's pain suddenly, and I'm toeing the edge of a D-jack I know, but I can't help it. DevilGOD has my daughter. And he using her to make me do what he wants. (HE) (HAS) (HER!!!!!) In the back of my mind, there's a disturbance. It's something that DevilGOD said... I ignore the feeling for the moment and push harder. There's more pain and then I feel something in realspace--a wetness around my mouth and chin. A second later, consciousness is stripped from me. Things fade back after that, not sure how long after. I open my eyes, realizing that I'm not completely vertical anymore. Instead, I'm leaning back a little, against somebody. JACK and 2-85 are in my immediate field of view, and those arms around me have lesh (writ) on them, so they have to belong to shea(3)va. And it's she who speaks first, close to my ear. "syl, are you hurt?" "My nose is bleeding," I say, touching my upper lip with two fingers, raising them, red and cold. "That's what happens..." shea(3)va says. ...when you pull a stunt like that are the unspoken words that complete her sentence. Hairstalk brushes my knee. "What did you see?" JACK asks. She has the same look that I can see in the rest of the wirewitches behind her. Except for 2-85. He looks worried and angry and emotionless all at the same time. He also looks like he wants to crush me in his arms and then-- Or maybe that's just my imagination. I wipe my upper lip on the back of my hand and push vertical, sitting under my own power. Just a slight headache, but other than that, I feel fine. Only, feeling scared and angry and nervous isn't all that fine. I'm scared because I believe everything that DevilGOD told me. I believe he's real. I believe he has my daughter. And I believe he's going to wreak destruction across this planet. I don't know how, I don't know why, and I don't know what I can do about it. All I want to do is find my daughter and hold her in my arms, smell her skin and kiss her cheek. Watch her grow up while I grow old. A seed of fear plants itself within me and takes root, and that fear is that I'm powerless to do anything about what's going to happen. Everybody seems to think I'm important, and I'm being manipulated because of it. They don't realize how insignificant I really am, how weak and vulnerable. I look at JACK and 2-85, and the others, feeling shea(3)va's arms around me. I think of em(0) and that little seed of fear blossoms, shooting up into a kind of panic. I'm going to lose all them. I just know it. (so make the most of the time you have, angel) Tears aren't coming, but my face must show my distress because JACK asks, "What's wrong, syl? What did you see?" I shake my head, unable to answer, so JACK leans forward, puts her hand on my shoulder and her cheek close to mine. "Don't worry about it," she says. "Don't go anywhere," I choke out, pulling her closer. The three of us just sit there embracing for several minutes. I try to calm my breathing. I stare at 2-85 over JACK's shoulder. He's going to find some way to touch me when I stand up, I can see it in his eyes. Everybody's will know about us. This, despite the fact that we just agreed to take it slow and not tell anybody. (going to lose) (him too) (angel) I push those thoughts down, sighing and relaxing, safe and warm in the arms of my friends. PIIX breaks the silence. "What did you see?" JACK makes some small growl, but I interrupt, "No, it's okay. I'll tell all of you. Let me stand up." I untangle myself from shea(3)va and JACK. My knees pop as I stand. My finger and my foot hurt, from the small wounds there. Running a hand through my hair, I'm moving past JACK, intentionally not considering the consequences of doing this. 2-85 is like a brick wall in front of me. Then I'm up on my tiptoes, throwing my arms around his neck, and--surprising even myself--kissing him hard. It's our best kiss so far. My heart is hammering loudly, and his is too. Gasps from behind me. Somebody laughs. When I pull away, there's blood on 2-85's lip. What?! Did I bite him? "It's yours," 2-85 says. Oh, my bleeding nose. I step away away from him and turn to the others, but JACK's the one whose reaction I'm interested in. She's known how 2-85 felt about me for awhile, and she's known how I felt about him even before I could admit it myself. JACK stares at me for a moment, then visibly sighs. She can't roll her eyes, but she lifts her head a little and flips her hairstalks, as if I'm the most exasperating person on the face of the planet. "Are you finished?" JACK asks, her voice barely above a growl. I hold her gaze. "For the moment." "You and I will talk more about this." "I know." "But later." "Yes, later would be best." "It's all my fault," I say. "Don't blame him." JACK smiles. "I know it's your fault. Now, are you going to tell us what you saw or are you and my warlock going to continue the show?" Glitch, I hope I'm not blushing. Doesn't make any sense. I think I'm just relieved that she didn't go all wirewitchy on me for lip-locking 2-85 in front of her. Then again, kissing is what wirewitches do. Should be fine to kiss one back. Other things aren't fine. Thoughts of other things send color into my cheeks. Glitch me. I'm supposed to be scared and worried for my daughter and my friends. Not supposed to be letting my mind wander to...intimacies. (looking for some comfort, angel?) (need a) hug? (need a) ... "Let's walk," shea(3)va says. "syl still needs the gur (dan) to look at her. Let's go back. She can walk and talk at the same time." I take 2-85's hand and don't let go as we walk. Those blue swirls he has for eyes are hypnotic, and I fall into them. "You aren't very good at keeping secrets," he whispers into my ear. "Only some of them." "You changed your mind." "Yeah," I say. "I changed my mind." "Less whispering, more telling us what you saw," JACK says. As we exit the gad (rin) I tell them everything I saw. I finish as we arrive back at our dome. All the while, I'm filled with a mixture of fright, tension, love, concern, confusion, and giddiness. Inside all that is a nagging feeling that I'm missing something. I'm not making a connection I need to. I lay down on the couch in the center room while shea(3)va summons the gur (dan). van(9)nis brings food for us. I'm tired, but there's no way in glitch I'll be able to sleep tonight. Not with all that's happened today. My story of DevilGOD brings to mind about a million questions, but nobody's asking anything. All the wirewitches are standing, restless. 2-85 is pacing, as if he needs to burn off energy or he'll explode. "This doesn't change much," JACK says. "Except for now we know exactly where your daughter is. If we assume this DevilGOD exists and is telling the truth, then he told us exactly where he is. We're going to get your daughter back. I promise you that, syl. We're your friends, so we're still coming with you. Just like he said." Take only your friends. Take only your friends. Take only your-- Wait. That's not right. Not right at all. I sit up, jumping to my feet on the couch as it hits me. "What is it?" JACK asks. Take only your friends. Take only your friends. Take only your-- No. That's not how it goes. It goes like this: You have to take them all with you, or they'll die. Every last one of them. I swear, my head heavy in my hands now under the weight of Calamity's words. I ignored them before, because I had no reason to leave Athara. Then, I forgot them in my lust to retrieve my daughter. Now, they're clear and scary in my head. Take them, or they all die. DevilGOD told me to only take a few. Calamity told me to take all the Driftlings with me. Contradictory commands. I can only obey one. And if Calamity is DevilGOD's emissary, then why did he-- shea(3)va enters the room then, dath(2) behind her. "Why are you standing on the couch?" she asks. I ignore her, caught up in thoughts of what I'm pretty sure I have to do next. "shea, can you contact shar(8)ra? Tell her that tomorrow morning the Sphek will be meeting outside, at the center of the city. Also tell her to pass the word that the whole city needs to be there." "Why does everybody need to be there?" shea(3)va asks. I sigh, and I'm trembling at my own words: "Because, they're all going to have to decide whether they're going to leave Athara or die." |
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Post: 04.30.2007 Date: 10.27.2196 Time: Morning Shadow Of The Gad (rin) My story begins where all good stories should--at the beginning. I tell them everything, only leaving out anything I don't remember and a few things I don't want everybody knowing, but I don't leave a lot out. With what I'm telling them, what I'm asking them to do, they deserve to know it all. My only real hope at getting them to accept what I'm telling them is to put it all in the context of my life. I've been talking for over two hours, and my throat is dry and raspy, but I've resolved to get through this. I finish, my last words sounding flat and muffled. "That's all I have to say. Now you have to decide what you're gonna do. You know your choices. Follow me, or stay here. Those are your only two choices. My lif (pah) demands that I leave Athara. This is my narrow path. If you choose to follow me, you will find yourself walking alongside me. It will not be easy, but the narrow path isn't always easy, right?. Follow me and fight by my side for survival, or stay here and wait for death or extinction. The choice is up to you. Choose now. If you are staying, do nothing. I will pray for you. If you choose to come with me, make swift plans to depart. My blod (sis) sheava and her husband vannis will be organizing the preparations. Talk with them right back here after the midday meal to find out what needs to be done. Time is short. We are leaving in five days." The patterns--almost lesh (writ), but not quite--beneath my feet seems to mock me. You don't know what you're doing. You don't know what you're asking of them. You're going to get everybody killed. I don't know what the designs on the ground really mean, or if I ever did. They were carved and painted before I was born. The designs curl and swoop just like the markings on my bare arms, and just like those that are hidden by my clothes. All of it means something. All of it's a mystery to me. Just one of many. I'm in the center of the city, standing in the early morning shadow of the gad (rin), and wondering if I'm doing the right thing. Nobody's really standing on the tiled, circular area except for me; they're all outside it, keeping their distance, looking at me, waiting for more. Too bad for them since there isn't more. I said what I had to say, and now they all have a choice to make: Follow the blue-haired girl on a hopeless quest to save her probably-already-worm-food daughter and stop a madman the blue-haired girl dreamed about from destroying humanity or take the logical course of action by staying home and rebuilding your city, ignoring the obviously insane youngling who claimed Sphek leadership on a technicality. Easy choice. Only there's one catch: the blue-haired girl, who some call Athara-Meeatora for some ridiculous reason, says if you stay, you die. I can see it in their eyes. Even if they do believe me, it's not a choice any of them wanted to be presented with this early in the morning. Most of the Sphek members are sitting on the benches at the edge of the circle. I briefed them with what I was going to say before I said it. None of them took it well, but none of them could stop me from saying it. There are so many Driftlings around me. Mind tells me that it's virtually all of them. They all came out to hear me tell them that it wasn't going to be just me and the wirewitches leaving Athara--it needed to be everybody. (you sure, angel, you sure) (you should be trusting the rivot bot more than) (your) (other) (father?) (you sure, angel, you sure) (you should be trusting) (anybody?) I blow out a breath because I've said all I can say, all that I need to say, and move toward JACK and the wirewitches. The crowd, which was strangely quiet while I was talking, explodes into noise. I can't help but flinch. The circle begins to collapse around me. The Sphek members, whose gazes have been drilling through me, threatening to set me on fire for the past two hours, are closing in on me. Fast. JACK and 2-85 are faster, shielding me with their bodies. "I need a drink of water," I say. "What you need is some sense slammed into you," shar(8)ra,--who's the closest Sphek member--says in a voice filled with frustration. 2-85, who's voice is filled with something more inappropriate for the situation, says, "What she needs is a good--" I cut him off by grabbing his hairstalk and pulling. "Stop right there, warlock." "Warlock? That's not what you called me last--" I lean in, pulling his hairstalk so that his head has to incline close to mine, whispering in his hear, "For this to work, you have to stop it right now. I mean it. Just because some people know about us doesn't mean you get to tease me out in the open." JACK makes a brief sound. 2-85 stiffens momentarily, then relaxes. His eyes are swirling torrents, and something about them has my heart pounding hard in my chest. I take deeper breaths, but it still feels like I'm not getting enough oxygen. "What about when we're not in the open?" I flash teeth and release his hairstalk, hopefully leaving him to wonder at my reaction. The Sphek is crowding around the three of us and trying to keep their distance from the wirewitches at the same time. Several of the Sphek members are shouting at me, but I find it impossible to make out what they're saying. Shouting Sphek. Roaring crowd. Too much information at once. "I'd like us to move to a safer area," JACK says. I stop her with a hand. "That's fine. But my fellow Sphek members are going to help me with that. We need to stop using the coven as crowd control. It's a bad precedent and it doesn't help their perception of wirewitches. They should respect you, but they shouldn't fear you." "Actually, they should fear us," JACK says. "You know what I meant." "That they shouldn't fear you because of us. I scan that." "You brought this on yourself," shar(8)ra says, her words breaking through the chaos around us. "I know that," I say, "but if this crowd doesn't give us some space, I'll have the wirewitches make some. You and I know we need to avoid that if we can." shar(8)ra clamps her mouth shut, her eyes boring into me for several seconds. I can tell she'd like nothing better than to take her hands to my throat and strangle some sense into me. Instead, she gives me a curt nod and starts motioning for the crowd to make way for us. It takes some time, but eventually we have a clear path, and we're able to extricate ourselves from the crowd. I see a lot of betrayed faces looking back at me. Even if I don't agree with their illusions about who and what Athara-Meeatora is, I can't really blame them. I'm their hero, their savior--whatever--and I just presented them with a lose-lose scenario. I really need to get away from all these people, before they decide to lynch me. I need a couple hours away so everything can sink in. Let them all not see their precious Athara-Meeatora for awhile. Get her out of their minds. If that's even possible. As for me, I need to get off my feet, get a drink of water, and eat something. A hug or two from 2-85 would be nice too. My thoughts of relaxing are pummeled into oblivion when I see who's standing in front of the entrance to the dome where we're staying. She's as beautiful and as terrifying as ever. nin(9) smiles as I walk right up to her, pushing past JACK and 2-85. "Good you're back from your little speech. Lose your friends. We need to talk. Alone." With that, she turns and goes inside, clearly expecting me to follow. Co. Sm. Ic. Glitch! |
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Post: 05.30.2007 Date: 10.27.2196 Time: Morning The Fracturing Of The World I don't want to go in there after her, but I know I'm going to. JACK steps in front of me. "No. No glitched way." I sigh because I agree with her. But outside of some sort of physical violence, I doubt nin(9) is going to be moved from any place she decides to stay. Besides, she's my blod (sis), and also my sister. (and don't forget that she tried) (to kill you) Should I really feel this tired this early in the morning? "I'll be fine," I say, though I probably don't sound as convincing as I could. "She follows blod (eth). My life is supposed to be as important to her as her own is. She can't hurt me anymore." "And what if she's willing to die so she can kill you?" JACK asks, eyes narrowing. "She's not going to kill me. That was never her goal." Maim, yes, but not kill. "Please don't go in there." "It's something I have to do." JACK grabs my shoulder, shaking her head. "No, but it's something you're going to do, isn't it?" "Yes." "Stubborn girl," JACK growls, but steps aside, her hairstalk brushing my leg. I try to step forward, but 2-85--who was standing behind JACK--blocks my way. I move close to him, staring up into his eyes. We're not touching, but there's an intimacy to the proximity between us that has me a little breathless. I lower my voice. "You're going to get in my way too?" "When are you going to tell us what's between you and nin(9)?" "I don't know. That depends. Maybe never." "If she touches you again, I will kill her." 2-85 slides to one side then, giving me unobstructed access to the dome entrance. "We'll wait here," JACK says. "I'll be right back," I say. As I enter the dome, I see PIIX and 7-07 approaching. nin(9) is waiting for me in the central room. She's sitting stiff on one of the couches, her hands on the edge of the cushion, fingers digging into the soft material. The skirt she's wearing only comes to mid-thigh, her knees exposed. Below that, her legs are wrapped, thick boots on her feet. Her shirt is tight against her chest, revealing her midriff, cleavage, and her arms. She stays right where she is when I came in. I get the impressions she's holding onto the couch so she doesn't come at me. I plop down in the couch opposite her, barely registering how good it is to get back off my feet. I force myself to stare her down. Her face is as blank as I've ever seen, and as unreadable as an empty sky. "What do you want, nin?" I ask. Came out calmer than I expected. Though her lips move, the rest of her body is motionless, her face empty of emotion. "You're leaving." "You heard? Information travels fast here." Glitch, where did that come from? I sound like...him. If I was hoping for some sort of reaction--and perhaps I was--I don't get it. "Only this time, you're not going alone," nin(9) says. "This time you're going to take as many of us down with you as you can." "Actually, I believe that those who come with me will have their only chance to survive. I mean, did you hear what I said this morning? Were you even there?" Still expressionless, her words are cold, slow and blank. "Of course I was there. Everybody was there. You're a fool. And anybody who follows you is a fool." "I'm sorry you think that. Is this all you came here for?" "You're going to kill them all," nin(9) states. "Your friends. Your people." I shiver when I say, "With me, they at least have a chance. At least they'll die fighting. Here, they'll just die." (that what you believe?) (really?) "You're going to get me killed," nin(9) says. "If you believe that, then I assume you're staying here?" nin(9) moves then, her head shaking. "You're going to get m'gan killed too. And that is something I can never forgive. Everything else--even your return--I could see myself letting go of, but not this." "So she's coming too? Why?" "Because blod (eth) has woven our lives together. Your life is as important as my own. Where you go, I...must...follow. I have to protect you. And where I go, m'gan goes. I can't convince her to stay. And for that, I hate you, and I always will." She cradles one hand in the other. The cradled hand is the one I injured. It's wrapped in white bandages. Her fingers poke out from the bandaging, where they flex over and over. She's surely feeling a lot of pain doing that, but nothing shows on her face. "What do you want from me, nin?" I ask, letting all the frustration I can muster flow through my voice. "You say my life is important to you now. You say you're going to follow me wherever I go. And yet, you hate what I'm doing. You hate me because we have the same father and you couldn't tell anyone. You hate me because they call me Athara-Meeatora. You hate me because I got all the attention and you were overlooked. When I had decided to leave Athara, you were able to extract a promise from me that I'd never come back. You hate me because I broke that promise and returned. You hate me and just about everything I've done. But when it comes down to it, you just hate me because I'm who I am. Well, glitch you to Eiech, nin, because there's not a glitched thing I can do about that!" My body's buzzing--not with static, but with a current of adrenaline. I get off the couch and stick a finger in nin(9)'s face. "You're a child, nin, and you're acting like a jealous little youngling. It's glitched pathetic. I don't remember anything from before, but I don't see how I could've been friends, much less blod (sis) with a manipulative, selfish little g'ekk like yourself. You attacked me with your sever-whip! You hurt me! That is not how a blod (sis) acts! That's not how sisters are!" nin(9) actually bows her head, averting her gaze. What is going on here? This not how I expected her to react. What is she doing? Is she trying to get me to lower my defenses? My sever-whip is on my hip. I'll use it if I have to. If she tries anything with her... Wait, she's not wearing her sever-whip. Even though I damaged the one she was using, surely she would have acquired a temporary one. I blow out a breath, trying to get myself back under control. "I need to know something, nin. Are you unbalanced? Mentally. You're not acting rationally." "I'm not insane," she replies. (she wouldn't tell) (you if she) (was) "If you're not insane, then what are you?" "I'm angry, syl. So very angry. My anger is very...potent." Like I needed to be told that. "Why the glitch are you here?" "To tell you that I still hate you, and that I'm not going to stop." I feel like throwing my head back and screaming in frustration, but then the wirewitches would come running in here and it'd end up pretty messy. "Thanks. I appreciate it." nin(9) looks up. "And to tell you that I'll be in charge of arming you, your friends, and your followers. I'll be responsible for general security and your security in specific. I'll be supplying us with any weaponry we think we'll need. I'll be leading any combat we have to do. You and your friends will take orders from me when it comes to keeping you safe." Then she stands, right up in front of me. I don't back off when she shoves her face into mine. Way too close to have somebody that beautiful that you can't kiss or caress, but I hold my ground, fighting off the irrational urge to run my fingers through her hair. Her perfume must be a hallucinogen or something; it's the only explanation for this effect she has on me. How can you be so intoxicated by somebody who like nothing better that to wrap a plasma wire around your neck and hand you from a tree? nin(9) finishes with a, "Do you understand? You've fractured my world enough for several lifetimes. That needs to stop. This will help." She may not be insane, but she's...she's something. I nod, my nose briefly rubbing against hers. My whole face tingles. nin(9)'s smile is complete wickedness. "Whatever you do, steer clear of the wirewitches," I say. nin(9) keeps her smile, then turns to leave. She's headed toward the side hall, where there's an exit that isn't infested with wirewitches. Before she enters the hall, she turns over her shoulder and says, "Oh, and if you really want to kiss me, all you have to do is ask." I better not be blushing. Her face goes hard and her eyes go cold then, "Never mind. I don't let myself be kissed by liars." She leaves. I'm alone. I sit back down on the couch. I call out for JACK. She comes, along with the rest of the coven. We eat. We drink. I listen to JACK ramble on in her meaningless rapidspeak. The afternoon wanders away, and I'm not sure that I make good use of the time. I'm leaving my homeland, without believing that I'll ever be able to return. Seems like I should be performing grandiose, monumental tasks to prepare for my epic journey. But I don't. Instead, I listen to my wirewitch friend tell me stories of her original coven. She speaks as if they were alive only yesterday. I escape into her words, defying the gravity of reality, pushing off into a time that was perhaps a better time than now. For a time, I'm able to forget my present. For a time I'm able to relax. Later that night, shea(3)va and van(9)nis return to the dome and reality sets in. shea(3)va hands me a list of those that are leaving Athara with us and collapses onto the couch. I turn it over, but the other side is blank. "Where's the rest of the list?" I ask. shea(3)va shakes her head. "That list is complete. It's everybody who talked to me." "But..." I say, no small part of my heart breaking. "I'm sorry, syl." The list shakes as my hand begins to tremble, because I'm staring at a list of less than fifty names. |
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Post: 06.30.2007 Date: 10.27.2196 Time: Evening Shedding Last Tears "This can't be all of them," I say. shea(3)va slides a hand across my shoulders and one-arm hugs me. I look over at her. Her eyes glisten with tears barely restrained. "Do you believe in what I'm doing?" I ask her. "I do," she replies without hesitation. "I shouldn't, but I do. And I always have. I've known for a long time that you were destined for great things, sis. I just didn't suspect how terrible some great things could be." I hug her back, wishing I could cry with her, but that dam hasn't been destroyed yet. "I'm sorry." "It's not your fault." (oh yes it is, angel, yes it IS) "What about vannis?" I ask. shea(3)va smiles, wiping away a tear that escaped down her cheek. "Oh, he does what I tell him like a good Atharan husband does." Still drawing comfort from our hug, I raise the list and take a closer look at it. I don't recognize all of the names forty-two names, but the familiar ones jump out at me. jin(6), the young man who was bold enough to stop me in the street and propose blod (mat). He has the type of blind devotion that's dangerous, but in this case, it just might save his life. cyn(7)dar's name is there too. Not sure if that surprises me or not. As with many things about cyn(7)dar, I'm just not sure. dath(2), the gur (dan) who delivered ela. m(3)gan's name is right below nin(9)'s. There are three Sphek member names there. (2)amlela, ikki(5), and (6)flayle. "With you, vannis and myself, the coven, and your modie friend, we have exactly fifty," shea(3)va says. Too few. Way too few. "em(0) would've followed you," shea(3)va says quietly, smoothing hair away from my forehead. "That's what flayle and ikki told me when they came to me." "What did amlela say?" I ask. shea(3)va grunts. "Nothing. But I can tell you that she didn't look happy." "Nobody should be happy about this." JACK clears her throat from the couch where she's sitting. "This isn't about happiness. This is about saying and doing what you think you have to. This is about your....your lif (pah). This is about survival." "Do you believe in what I'm doing?" I ask. JACK stands and walks over to me. shea(3)va slides out of our hug, giving JACK room to replace her. She leans in, making sure I can't ignore her simple words. "I am your friend. (2)syl. I believe in you." So simple. So complex. So un-wirewitch-like. There are tears in JACK's eyes. One slips free and traces a jagged trail down uneven metaskin. I put a hand to her cheek to stop that liquid from falling to the floor. I wish I could cry with JACK and shea(3)va, share that outlet with them, but something's blocking that particular release. Her hairstalk comes around my waist, pulling me closer to her body. I exhale and cling to her till I can feel her heart thumping up against mine. "I'll do my best to ," I say, "to not let any of you down." "You're doing fine," JACK says. "I envy your tears," I say, looking first at JACK, then at shea(3)va. shea(3)va nods. "When we get ela back, you'll cry enough. Just wait." JACK wipes at her eyes, straightens up. "No more. Until your daughter rests in your arms and sucks at your breast, these are the last tears I'll shed." I hug her harder than ever. I don't deserve her. or the rest of them, angel. "You should sleep," shea(3)va says. "We all should. The next days will be hard. Let's get one night of good rest." Wise advice. Still... "I want to go to the Haven to see Kiiziiziixii, and to pray," I say. I need to hear her voice and her counsel. "You can pray here," 2-85 says. "I will go to the Haven and bring her back here." When he passes me to leave, our fingertips brush. I give a start at an electric thrill that shoots up my arm. Even though he takes a lot longer than any of expected he would, when 2-85 returns, my body still feels like it's charged. Need to touch him again to release this current that's buzzing around all up inside me. But I can see in his face that something is wrong the second he enters. "What is it?" I ask, running to him, 7-07 and PIIX springing forward to block the entrances to the dome. 2-85's eyes are cold, the currents in his eyes gone still. "The Haven has been damaged. The sanctuary is...desecrated." "Do you know who--" I begin to ask. 2-85 shakes his head. "I don't know, but your modie friend is nowhere to be found in the entire city. Kiiziiziixii is gone." |
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Post: 07.31.2007 Date: 11.01.2196 Time: Morning Leaving Home, Never To Return There are ten of the tiny pills sitting in the palm of my hand. They're shiny red, and they're perfect spheres. shea(3)va pushes my fingers closed over the pills. "Just take one pill before. Each one lasts about twenty-four hours. Past that, it's safest to take another." "I...I don't think I'm gonna need--" "Just take them. That way you'll have them if you do. And if you use all those, I have more." I let my fingers fall open, revealing the pills once again to the soft, early morning light filtering in through the opening above my bed. The weight of what's happening today is heavy on my shoulders; the pills and their implications, warm and glossy in my hand, seem somehow out of place, like I'm not treating today with proper reverence. The thought of taking one into my mouth, rolling it around on my tongue, then swallowing it down fills me with no small amount of delirious dread. shea(3)va hugs me. I push a few orange strands from her forehead. "I love you, shea. I wish I could remember us as kids together." "I love you too, sis. And don't worry, it'll all come back to you someday. Everything will work out all right in the end." (oh really, will it?) "Think so?" I ask, echoing my thoughts out loud. "Sure," shea(3)va says, flashing me a wicked smile and putting her forehead to mine. "All we have to do is travel across half the continent avoiding Zomboids and some creatures called Horrorsaurs, then find a place call Driftfane's Sin in Black Vale Six and do...something, then go to the Wastelands to hunt down some insane guy named DevilGOD, rescue your daughter, and prevent him from destroying humanity. Should be simple." A large part of me wants to laugh, because what she describes is ludicrous in the extreme. Another part of me wants to cry, because I'm going to attempt to do all that, and I'm the worst sort of person since I'm dragging those closest to me along. I shove all that down. I grab shea(3)va's head, one hand forced to hold the bone that curves over her ear like a demon's horn. "How can you believe in me?" shea(3)va's hands come up to cup the back of my head, her fingers combing through my hair. "I believe everything you've ever told me, syl. That's all you need to know. I've believed you all my life, and I've believed in you all my life. I do not call you Athara-Meeatora idly, but that's what I choose to call you." God, please let me cry! I don't deserve a friend like this! Let me shed a few tears for the pain I've caused her, and the hurt that's yet to come! Please, God, please! "Will you give me my shot?" I choke out, swallowing hard. I normally do it myself, but I don't trust my shaking hands to be able to do the job this morning. "Of course," she says, kissing me on the cheek, releasing me, reaching over to the table beside the bed, where a single injector lies waiting. It's filled with a blue liquid that I still need on a daily basis unfortunately. I offer my arm and shea(3)va places the injector on the vein at the edge of my bicep. There's a small hiss of air and a brief second of discomfort. The blue liquid drains cold into my body, quickly going warm. I shudder, not at all comfortable with what's happening, trying not to think about it. Well, I haven't gone witchy yet, and I'm not dead. Guess this stuff is still working. shea(3)va and I are dressed and ready to go. My personal backpack, pockets stuffed with everything I own, sits on the floor at the side of the bed. I open one of the front pockets that isn't completely filled and drop the ten red pills into it, then reseal the pocket. "Ready?" shea(3)va asks. "No," I say. "Lead the way then, sis." shea(3)va points to the door. I grab my cloak from where it rests on the bed. With my other hand, I pick up my backpack and throw it over my shoulder. Can't help but pause at the door, following shea(3)va out, looking back as if I'm forgetting something or leaving something behind. I realize with some degree of sadness that I haven't been in this room long enough to grow attached to it. I turn and leave, never to return. * * * The sun is low, but rising, strangely bright and hot, but the weather in the world is unpredictable anymore, so no shock there. My clothing is protecting me from the brunt of the sun's rays, but I haven't raised my hood yet. It's not time yet. I'll do that when when we get outside the city perimeter. We're gathered at the west side of the city, making sure that our supplies and equipment are in order. Almost ready to leave now, anytime. Very soon. Hard to believe that our time here is so short now. It's difficult for me, and I can't even remember any of my life here. For the rest of the Driftlings following me...well, I can only imagine what they're going through. It's hard to leave your home. Even harder when you don't think you'll ever be able to come back. Knowing that your home is dead and dying is a difficult thing. I'm in the middle of a crowd of people that shea(3)va and van(9)nis are coordinating. To one side are all the backpacks and supplies we'll be carrying ourselves. Next to that is Scorp--the one vehicle we're taking. Not sure where nin(9) acquired it, where she was keeping it, or how we're even being allowed to take it, but apparently she's adept at getting her way. The Corp is a large, multi-purpose vehicle with an angular two-seat cockpit set low to the ground. Wide belt treads frame the body on either side. Textured guards over the treads will allow some of us to ride along if necessary. The main body consists of an open hold that can be used to carry supplies and people. We're going to be using it for both. nin(9) and her forces have attached weapon mounts around the perimeter of the hold. Most of the weapons are currently stowed away in a compartment in the hold. Thing runs on a technology I don't understand--I looked inside the engine compartment and it was all glowing and shiny and pretty. nin(9) says it'll run long after we're all grave food. Gotta love technology. I don't ask too many questions of her, on account of she hates me and all. No lie about it, the Scorp looks imposing. It's been impossible to keep the younglings from climbing on it. Looking at the Scorp now, I can't help but think that Kiiziiziixii would have liked to see it, use it, drive it. She seemed to know her way around weapons. We still don't know where she is. There was no trace of her in the Haven. Gut feelings say she was responsible for the damaged state of the Haven, but since she's not here, we can't make any firm conclusions. I feel loss at her not being her. She said she'd be with me until out paths no longer crossed. Guess I thought she'd let me know when they stopped doing that. Guess I was wrong. I survey the crowd. Everybody's here. The wirewitches. nin(9), her black-cloaked security forces, and m(3)gan. cyn(7)dar lurks at the edge of the crown, stealing glances at me when he doesn't think I'm looking, turning away when he catches me catching him. Gonna have to deal with him soon. jin(6), who hasn't proposed marriage to me recently, and has even stopped bowing down when he sees me, leans against the Scorp, a young girl about his age crying against his chest. I don't know who she is, so that means she's not coming with us. Glitch. jin(6) has one arm around her back, gently smoothing her hair with the other. I don't even want to know what he's whispering to her, because I can see tears in his eyes too. Glitch, glitch, glitch! The three other Sphek members who are coming with me are helping she(3)va and van(9)nis with the final organization tasks. Around my followers, other Driftlings watch us. I've been forcing myself to meet their eyes, even if I don't like what I see. There's sadness, mostly, but anger in far too many. Most of the goodbyes we have to say have been said, and nin(9)'s guards are keeping most everybody at a distance. I don't see any of the other Sphek members in the crowd, and that I definitely don't like. Not sure what I expected, but I guess it wasn't that. I walk over to nin(9) when I see her scan the crowd ten times in a minute. "Still after that kiss?" she asks. I'm sure it's an unconscious act on her part, but m(3)gan takes a step closer to nin(9). "You'd be so lucky," I shoot back. Not that our relationship has been cordial by any stretch, but maybe it would be easier if we were at each other with sever-whips. Ah, the good old days. "Where's your mother?" I ask. nin(9) masks whatever she's feeling being a flash of anger. "What does it matter, syl? She's not coming with us." "Did you say goodbye to her?" "Long ago, sis, long ago." She fiddles with the handle of her sever-whip, then meets my eyes, not afraid of anything. "The Scorp is ready to roll." I nod, saying, "You can say goodbye more than once you know." I turn away, leaving whatever retort she came up with dying on her oh-so-pretty lips. van(9)nis approches me as I walk away, toward JACK and the wirewitches. "We're ready. Everybody's here. All supplies are loaded. Nothing standing in our way now." I turn back to nin(9), who is casting one more look at the crowd. I point a thumb skyward. She pulls something from her belt and then the Scorp's engine begins to whine. That gets everybody's attention. They're all looking at me. I give them a simple nod, then they're all picking up their packs. Those that will be marching first start to form up in ranks alongside the Scorp. shea(3)va is beside me suddenly. Her face is worried. "Aren't you going to say something?" I look from her to van(9)nis to JACK to 2-85 to the rest of my followers, to the rest of the Driftlings around us. "I've said everything that needs to be said." shea(3)va shakes her head. "No. You need to say goodbye. To all of them. Last time you skipped this step, and it hurt. Please don't do it again." She right, oh so very right. I should "Help me up," I say, taking shea(3)va's hand and pulling her with me over to the rear of the Scorp. She clasps her hands together and boosts me up into the hold. From there, I climb over carefully stored supply containers until I'm standing on the top of the Scorp. The whine of the engine has died down beneath me, faint vibrations travelling through my body, like I'm standing on a live current source. The crowd goes mostly silent around me. I raise my arms from beneath my cloak, baring my markings to the scorching sun, where they stand out in harsh contrast to the rest of my skin. I shout, though maybe I don't need to. I'm sorta nervous. "I am Athara-Meeatora. I am a daughter of Athara. I leave you, my home and my people, not because I want to, but because my lif (pah) demands it of me. My narrow path, like many of yours is not at easy one. Still, it is ultimately my choice. I am leaving you today, perhaps never to return. If that is the case, then I will miss you and this place more than you will ever know or believe. I will tell you now what I didn't tell you the last time I left. And that is goodbye." And that's where I stop. I had more in my mind, but I can't go on. I want to, need to, cry, but nothing's coming out, so it's just hurting. I step down, lost in a miasma of physical agony and torment of my own making. All around the crowd is cheering or booing, can't really tell in the state I'm in. I come down into shea(3)va's arms. "Get it moving," I say to nin(9) as we pass her. I raise my hood, then lower it down over my head. There's a backpack in my hand suddenly and then I'm following the wirewitches, shea(3)va supporting me. van(9)nis is on the other side of me, holding both his and his wife's backpacks. Every step we take is painful, and my feet feel like they're trudging through swamp muck. Behind us now, Athara roars, in cheers or jeers I can't separate. I take one look back, and I do see shar(8)ra at the edge of the crowd, her head in her hands. nin(9)'s in the pilot seat of the Scorp, so she doesn't see. "Don't look back anymore," shea(3)va whispers in my ear. I obey, try to hold my head up, and walk on. Oh God, what have I done? Our exit from the city perimeter is only disturbed by a scream behind us. Spinning, I see a woman running at us, breaking away from a small crowd and an army of younglings that were following us. I see something metal glinting in her hand, then purple blobs of light streaking over my head. She's screaming my name. Oh, and also something about killing me. |
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Post: 08.31.2007 Date: 11.01.2196 Time: Morning Final Sunset On Athara I'm stupefied for a moment, but an explosion at my feet sends up dirt and purple smoke, shaking me out of my hesitation. The hissing down there near my boots is the ground dissolving from the blast. The tip of my boot is smoking, eaten away by the lingering, purple acid cloud. I step back. The woman stops, sets her feet, and takes aim. "Where is she?!" she screams. I have my sever-whip almost out, almost activated, but things aren't moving fast enough. Not sure what I can do anyway. She's got a cid (tol), and it'll beat a sever-whip any day of the week. Can't block a glowing blob of acid. Probably eat right through the plasma wire. Flash of blue into the air. One of the wirewitches jumped from behind me, arcing toward the woman. The distraction works. The woman looks up, taking her eyes from me, only for a second, until she realizes that she just make a mistake. Another blur of movement and the woman rockets to the ground. A purple blob of light streaks out into the desert, away on a harmless trajectory. Her weapon lies several feet away from her crumpled form. cyn(7)dar stands over her, fist raised to deliver another blow should she move. Behind us, the whine of the Scorp dies. "Don't get up, don't move a muscle," he commands. 2-85 lands beside cyn(7)dar. 2-85's body is all spiky and dangerous. His left arm is elongated, narrowing to a point. He directs the arm to the woman's throat. A dangerous growl is coming from his throat. cyn(7)dar kneels down. Around me, the crowd whispers. I'm shaking. I deactivate my sever-whip, since it seems safe to do so. I suppose she could have other weapons on her... "She's clean," cyn(7)dar says, standing back up. "She only had the one weapon." "Can she stand?" I ask. The timing of her attack is curious. cyn(7)dar leans down and whispers in the woman's ear. She groans, but I see her nod. He grabs her arms and begins to help her up. I wave 2-85 back over. He hesitates at first, growling at the woman. Body's buzzing with adrenaline, but my mind is shockingly calm. Not sure why that is. I should be cowering behind the nearest rock, shuddering and cold with how close I just came to being liquified. Several of nin(9)'s guards are hovering off to one side. Guess they're there to protect me, but they're keeping their distance for the moment. cyn(7)dar supports the woman with one hand at her back, her arm thrown over his shoulders. It's a vulnerable position for him, I suppose, but there's nothing on his face that conveys any concern for his safety. Instead, he's just watching me, waiting to see what I'll do. Those eyes have that familiar looks of longing, regret, and anger. Strangely, or perhaps not, I feel nothing. Well, almost nothing. What does that mean? The woman spits blood onto the ground and then looks up at me. She has a strong face. There are crinkles at the corners of her eyes, as if from a lifetime of laughter or tears, or both. Her body's wrapped, and she's wearing her cloak with the hood flung back, her hair is bright yellow and pulled back into a long braid that's coming undone in several places. A row of bone protrusions along her neck force her head slightly askew, making her look like she's considering something thoughtfully. Only the look on her face is anything but thoughtful. It's... It hits me then, a realization, a connection I didn't know that I could make. But I can. I recognize that look, because it's one I've had myself. It's the look of a mother who's lost her child. "What's your name?" I ask as calmly as I can manage. "sara(8)li," she says. "You tried to kill me." "You took my daughter from me." ...lost her child. "I'm sorry, sarali, I don't know who your daughter is, and I can promise you that--" I'm going to finish with --I wouldn't take your daughter from you, but she cuts me off before I can determine whether I'm lying or not. "Keetcha, liar!" she spits. "My daughter is with you! You're going to get her killed! You're taking my baby from me! Give her back!" That look--that frantic mother's look--tells me I can't reason with her. nin(9) is beside me now. She smirks at me, mocking, then turns to sara(8)li. "Nobody knows what you're talking about. We don't have your youngling. Nobody is here against their will. Go back home and search for your child there." sara(8)li's eyes flash, but she doesn't strain against cyn(7)dar's hold on her. "She's not in the city. She's with you." She's looking at me when she says all of that. nin(9) doesn't like being ignored--I can see that in the tensing of her body--but a voice from the crowd stops her from responding. We all turn toward the voice. A man makes his way toward us through the crowd. He breaks through. He keeps his distance, though he looks like he'd move closer if he could. "Who the glitch are you?" nin(9) demands. "It's okay," the man says, "I'm her husband." I think the woman would fall to the ground if cyn(7)dar wasn't holding her up. Not from the blow he'd inflicted on her, but from the emotional burden almost visible on her shoulders. She looks like she's going to crumble at any second. "Honey," the husband says, "anih isn't here. I respected your wishes. I didn't take her with me." We shouldn't be here watching this. None of us should. And yet, it's all my fault isn't it? Maybe I have to be here. Maybe this is penance. There's some commotion behind me, but I ignore it. Can only deal with one crisis at a time. sara(8)li's face is streaked with tears now. "She's not at home. This is all your fault." Again, that last part was spoken directly to me. "I'm sorry," I say. "Don't apologize," the man says. "It's not your fault." (oh but it sure as glitch IS, angel) "Don't take my baby from me," sara(8)li pleads. Wirewitch hand on my shoulder. Turning, it's JACK. "I found her hiding on the Scorp," she says. "What? Who?" I ask, mind slow, not connecting dots. I look down. There's a small hand in JACK's. Yellow-red hair that looks strangely familiar streams down, loose and free, around the face of a girl with bright, yellow eyes. The girl waves at me but doesn't smile. "anih!" the woman shouts, now trying to break free of cyn(7)dar's grasp. He looks at me then lets her go. JACK pulls me back a few steps and pushes me behind her as sara(8)li runs a little unsteadily to her daughter. nin(9) grunts in disgust. She hides her face from me as she moves back to stand nearer the Scorp. "What did you think you were doing, anih?!" sara(8)li asks, wiping wetness from her cheeks. "I'm following her," is the response. anih points at me. "Just like daddy." "No, anih, you're coming home with me. You're too young to go with them." sara(8)li's voice betrays the fact that age has little to do with her daughter not leaving Athara. "But if we stay, we'll die," anih states as child-simple as can be, though I think she's about to imitate her mother and burst into tears. "Let her come with us," the husband says. "She's old enough to make this choice for herself. She knows what's a stake." "SHE'S ONLY SEVEN!!!" sara(8)li screams, standing, picking her daughter up and backing away, back toward the city. Her eyes are wild, scanning the crowd, but always returning to me. "You've taken my husband, but I'm not letting you get my daughter killed!" anih starts to struggle. It's only a matter of seconds and she's crying, flailing at her mother to try to break free. "Don't do this," the husband pleads. "None of you are coming back!" sara(8)li says. She holds her daughter tighter, continues moving backwards. "You're all damned!" JACK's hand squeezes my shoulder. "Should we..." "No," I say. "We can't." The Scorp's engine roars to life, drowning out the rest of sara(8)li's words and the wails of her daughter. The husband stares back, as if watching something die. I can't take it. I turn my back to all of them. There's nothing I can do. I'm made my choice, and everybody else has made theirs. Only one thing to do now, and that's to move forward. The sounds of sara(8)li's screams and her daughter's tears echo in my head like static. Behind us, the sun is rising, but as we walk away, all I can think is that it's really going the other direction, dropping down behind the world in sunset. And that it's doing it one last, one final time. |
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this page and its contents copyright (c) by ethan a. cooper |
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